All Of Dior's Fancy Fragrances, Ranked

1

Moths have flames, but Into The Gloss has fragrances. Can’t help but be drawn to them, especially the tall, dark handsome ones that make up the Maison Christian Dior collection. The Maison line, mon cher, is Dior’s bougiest perfume offering, and it just expanded a bit this summer with 12 new scents. Now a total of 21 fragrances to ogle, smell, and behold, the Maison fleet was ready for an ITG rite of passage—unfiltered judgement! Er, ranking! Taking a lesson from last year, the scents were sniffed quickly, for maximum comfort and headache prevention. So feast your eyes on this very efficient body of work. Ranked accordingly based on ingenuity and wearability.

21.

What Dior says: Juicy pear note which you can almost taste, like a dessert. Along with rose and a hint of wood, it retains some mystery. The perfume has a licentious, sexy and sensual charm, like a delectable woman.
What we said: [Tumbleweed blows] Next! —Ashley Weatherford

20.

What Dior says: Christian Dior was very superstitious and would stitch a stem of lily of the valley into the seam of his dresses for good luck. We wanted to represent the perfume of this hidden lily of the valley, sewn into meters of silk, with a profusion of white flowers and freshness. The scent of his favorite flower gradually reveals itself. Lucky is a good luck charm and the perfume to wear whenever you want to cross your fingers.
What we said: If there’s nothing missing in my life then whyyyy do these tears come at night? —Britney Spears

19.

What Dior says: This perfume is delectably tempting and sweet, yet never cloying. We chose exotic tonka bean for its slightly bitter roundness. This is a mouth-watering treat that nevertheless retains some mystery.
What we said: Like a sugar cookie. Delicieuse is obviously French for delicious. Don’t be a narc and Google to prove me wrong. —AW

18.

What Dior says: Oud Ispahan is like opening the doors of an oriental palace with ochre walls and being struck by its fragrance. The smoky scent of burning wood blends with that of sweet floral water on washed hands. That's the scent of this smooth atmosphere, where rose, frankincense and resin linger. The perfume is velvety and sensual, like the roses of the Orient.
What we said: Warm and wealthy. It just laughed at my bank balance. —AW

17.

What Dior says: In springtime, the Centifolia rose invades the gardens at La Colle Noire, Christian Dior's beloved home in Grasse. It is an extraordinary time, when the flower's fleshy, honeyed and fruity scent lingers in the air. This perfume is an ode to that magical place and to the unique rose that grows in my home.
What we said: I’ve never been to Grasse, but I can imagine that this scent was conceived within reach of some flowers. Having grown up in the suburbs, however, to me it smells like the mall. —Anna Jube

16.

What Dior says: This perfume is above all a scent that will stay with you. A sensual memory, a lingering emotion, the imprint left on a pillow and the powdery softness of bed linens… A caress of iris combines with a hint of almost animalistic Jasmine to express an exciting amorous passion.
What we said: What the most popular girl in high school would wear—you know, expensive...but not really inventive. —AW

15.

What Dior says: This creation was inspired by a memory of the May rose fields at dawn, when the flowers covered with fresh dew-drops await the pickers. It contains the vivacious green of the stems, snapped with a confident twist and the sharp, peppery spice that lingers on the fingers after the harvest.
What we said: What the most popular girl in high school also wears, but different because you’re not exactly sure where she bought this one. But maybe it’s better? But maybe the same. —Ali Oshinsky

14.

What Dior says: This intense composition transports you to the mysterious Far East. It is dark and bewitching, like entering the fragrant back room of an apothecary in Asia. Wrapped in mystical smoke, the scent of patchouli blends with wood and spicy coriander.
What we said: [Takes a long drag, blows smoke.] Patchouli? Haven’t heard that name in years. —AW

13.

What Dior says: Ambre Nuit orchestrates an encounter between two extremes. It is, in some way, the fragrant embodiment of Beauty and the Beast. This perfume combines the deep, animal facet of amber with the delicate velvet of Turkish rose. This potent duo is like a nocturnal wave of amber that sees strength and delicacy converse, where opposites attract.
What we said: Amber fragrances are easy to love, and this one is a nice, clean amber—not too much. But I think it’s leaning toward “candle” rather than “eau de parfum.” —AS

12.

What Dior says: This perfume is imbued with casual Parisienne charm. Its effusive and floral scent flirts with vivacious Orange and vibrant Gardenia before drawing to a close with cottony soft Musks. It has a real allure.
What we said: Super subtle yet addicting. Like an artsy film or more specifically Call Me By Your Name. Heard of it? —AW

11.

What Dior says: We wanted to evoke the carefree age of youthful folly. The scent is sharply sweet like a cranberry. Sparkling, almost insolent, at its fresh floral heart are Jasmine and Ylang Ylang. It's the perfume of a lovable woman and has the taste of happiness.
What we said: Fizzy and sweet. Something you’d definitely drink after work while complaining about Marge from accounting. —AW

10.

What Dior says: We sculpted this composition so that it provides contrasts, evoking a landscape of orange trees warmed by the sun and the rippling water of the Alhambra canals. The soul of this creation lies in the South and releases a delicate scent of orange blossom spiked with myrtle and cypress.
What we said: When I was little I used to eat whole cans of mandarin oranges out of the tin with a fork and that corn syrup-sweetened citrus scent is exactly what this perfume smells like. I love it, obviously. —AJ

9.

What Dior says: What if Dior gray was a perfume? This emphatic gray is not merely a mix of black and white, but is the result of a chromatic blend. This profusion of colors inspired a composition that blends jasmine and bergamot with humid notes of undergrowth. Color is transformed into an emblematic perfume. This lively scent is multifaceted and effortlessly elegant.
What we said: That’s a spicy meatball! —AW

8.

What Dior says: The Grasse flower fields in early autumn, when the air is filled with the flowers’ fruity scent. This is when the last jasmine flowers are harvested and they provide a delectable perfume similar to a floral liqueur. Composed as a tribute to late summer, Jasmin des Anges is a floral-fruity invitation with aromas of almost-candied apricots.
What we said: This smells like an older person’s scent—someone who has always had a scent, and it’s this, and it will always be this. —Emily Ferber

7.

What Dior says: Tiny and fragile though it is, a cherry blossom tree nevertheless releases a perfume with incredible presence evoking the breathtaking landscape of thousands of cherry trees in bloom. Sakura pays tribute to it by interpreting its gently lingering, tender perfume with rosy nuances.
What we said: Like baby oil, but really chic. A sexy baby? Forgive me. —AW

6.

What Dior says: This composition is as soft as a precious cashmere sweater. Powerful yet delicate white tea with a hint of smoke infuses a rosy note blended with a touch of maté. Thé Cachemire is as radiant as white flowers and as softly comforting as its cocooning musk notes.
What we said: Clean and watery, paired best with water and being clean. —AO

5.

What Dior says: If you are lucky enough to visit the island of Panarea, you can feel the sea breeze and the mineral aspect of the volcanic stone warmed by the sun and smell the flowers, fruits and rockrose. This fragrance draws inspiration from these strong sensations, like a moment spent in the shade of the fig tree, where effusive citrus fruits and a fresh breeze reminiscent of the Mediterranean sun, are liberated.
What we said: This smells like grass, but like a spicy grass, so more like watercress, or maybe arugula? I’m going to go with arugula because I think arugula is elegant, and this scent is, actually, elegant. —AJ

4.

What Dior says: In Venice, when a ball is held, an air of mystery prevails. Elegance hides behind masks just as Jasmine conceals its almost animal potency behind a floral facet. This scent has the powerful, nocturnal and sensual charm of a Venetian ball.
What we said: Ohhhh—champagne! But with a side of grass. Grass mimosa? —AJ

3.

What Dior says: The New Look femininity often inspires. We wanted to compose a perfume in which rose and jasmine unfurled, like a skirt with an outrageous quantity of fabric and a narrow, slender waist. Heady tuberose fully expresses this whirling vivacity.
What we said: What a great name. Props to this name. I would actually wear this one. There is definitely musk in this. Love a musk. —AJ

2.

What Dior says: A profusion of vivid flowers on a silk scarf. Like a delicate breeze, a bouquet of jasmine, rose and tuberose delivers a sensual message, like a whisper on the skin, or a kiss at the nape of the neck.
What we said: Like wet, clean skin after a shower. Doesn't "souffle” mean chocolate in French? I took Spanish. —AW

1.

What Dior says: The colors of an oriental-style painting revealing a world of dunes and horsemen. Its woody accord is a signature that is full of character, centered on a potent, animal Oud. It evokes saddle leather, the smell of a wood fire and sand
What we said: Warm leather. A sense of comfort. Fluffy cushions, solid arm rests, this couch is expensive. You’re in Restoration Hardware and you live here now. It’s a good feeling. —AO

Photographed by Tom Newton.